-By, Mrinalini Raj.
It was my birthday a couple of months ago. Already in my early 20s, this year I had plans to finally travel to Lucknow and Agra with friends. I was about to be a Postgraduate in English Literature by now, this June. I had plans with my NET certificate. I had plans for my career, my higher education.
And this article becomes one of the thousand others written during the Corona pandemic. What am I actually doing? Reading, watching rain from the window, reading some more, attending webinars, watching the sun from the window, attending lectures, conferences, reading a little more, watching birds from the window, cleaning the house, cooking, watching Shakespeare one moment, Kafka through a Ballet the next and watching windows from the window.
Do we have complaints? Are we responsible for what is happening in our lives? Is it even worth asking these questions? Is it any good looking back? Are we tired? Have we accepted it as the normal yet?
I don’t even want to answer them. I know I am not that sad, there is much more sadness I feel for others suffering right now, people losing their jobs, nowhere to go, no food to eat. I realise this isn’t even Black Death that was. This Is. I know I’ll get to read of this period for decades now. We all have this unstable touch to our lives. Slightly pained at our own conditions, slightly more at that of others.
So many of us have stopped looking at the rise of the Corona cases, which we checked daily for months initially. So many of us are worried over the policies, worried for the doctors/nurses, for the sanitation workers, for the police, for our parents working outside, for our own jobs.
My whatsapp status these days reads, ‘When in trouble and We can’t act, We hope’. This is very much of what I am believing in these days, which is helping me keep moving. I keep myself as engrossed in work as I can. So much has altered, we all have our own ways, our own opinions. Patience and hope are my keys to survival these days and they are quite effective for me. I don’t know how to end this article, maybe I’ll like to leave it in the middle, like all our lives are right now.